DidntSeeIt.com

Do you remember when I said that George Lucas was such a shitty director that you could pick some random guy in a stained shirt out of the line for the Indiana Jones ride at Disneyland and that guy would do a better job?

 
 
 
Holy shit he actually went and did it!
 
 
 
 
 
 
Anyways, so I read on [...]

It’s the new Heath Ledger movie! Have you seen the ads? There are some in my town.
It’s called The Dark Knight. You might have noticed that the movie says Dark and it looks darkly colored and people look like a creepy version of The Crow. These things are there to let you know that even [...]

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
The Forbidden Kingdom is a kung-fu movie starring the two biggest kung-fu stars of the last 30 years: Jackie Chan and Jet Li.
It is about how some people got the opportunity to make a kung-fu movie starring the two biggest kung-fu stars of the last 30 years, and said “Hey you know who should be [...]

10,000 B.C. is, as you can see, a movie about the first Burning Man. It was a long-ass time ago — like before Baker Beach. This was way back when they held it in the jungle. Michael Franti played. It was pretty sweet.
One thing I totally love about these movies that are supposed to [...]

Penelope is about a girl with a pig nose. People are complaining that Christina Ricci is always getting typecast as a sideshow freak, but I think she is making good choices. And besides, she produced that movie about the girl that had a pumpkin head.
What I do have a problem with is how like for [...]

Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers: Runnin’ Down A Dream is the kind of large-scope, high-concept stuff Hollywood doesn’t do much anymore. This film asks the question, “What if early-1970s director Peter Bogdanovich and late-1970s rocker Tom Petty had lived?”
Too often these alternate-reality fantasies fail in creating a credible and authentic new world, but it is [...]

The Spiderwick Chronicles is a kids’ movie based on a popular book series. I don’t remember what it was called.
It’s about some kids, an old house, a problem, some secret things, and a parent who is either mean or missing. It’s also about how it’s probably a good idea to not tell the authorities when [...]

There are some video games that I don’t even know exist until Uwe Boll makes a movie about them. I don’t know what exactly the game Dungeon Siege is like, but if it’s anything like the movie, it’s about some guys with expensive mortgages who are forced to humiliate themselves.
It stars that kick-ass bald guy, [...]

Glenn Close from “1001 Dalmatians” and Bellatrix Lestrange star in this Harry Potter ripoff.
It’s supposed to be a musical. Go see it only if only if you enjoyed George Burns singing “Fixing a Hole” from “Sgt. Pepper”.

What’s more exciting than a movie about Bob Dylan that doesn’t have Bob Dylan in it? A movie with Cate Blanchett wearing a bad wig and smoking! AND she can’t sing, just like Dylan! She’s uncanny, nearly Rich Little-like in her portrayal of the mumbler from Minnesota. That’s what I read on the Internet, anyway.
Also [...]